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Truth be told, younger children (under age 10) may feel confused, angry, or sad because they tend to be possessive of their parents.
Renowned researcher Constance Ahrons, who conducted a 20-year study of children of divorce, concluded that most children find their parent’s courtship behaviors confusing and strange.
She didn’t understand why Baylie didn’t share her enthusiasm for Kevin because he was so perfect for their family.
As Caroline spoke, disappointment was apparent in her voice: “Kevin’s just so ideal for our family and I can really be myself with him. I figured that Baylie would like him because he’s a lot of fun and I was blindsided when she started complaining about him.” During our second session, I asked Caroline if she had thought through any disadvantages of introducing her daughter Baylie to Kevin so soon.
The number-one thing to keep in mind when deciding when to introduce a new partner to your kids is timing after your divorce. Even if both of you are in love and seem to have a lot in common, breakups are common and kids get caught in the crossfire.Rather than planning a long visit, it’s best to have a brief, casual meeting with few expectations.Another important consideration when introducing your kids to a new love interest is their age.It may take them time to accept a new person in their life.For example, Caroline, a 36-year-old teacher, described her new partner Kevin as thoughtful, affectionate, and a great match for her.